So I've been reading this book called Lady In Waiting (Thanks Penni!), about becoming a woman of God whilst waiting for the guy God has waiting for you. One of the sections I just read got me thinking about some of my insecurities and shortcommings, and a chat I had with one of my pastors before coming back from Scotland. We'd been talking about what I had done and wanted to do in the ministry during my time there and I had told her that I had lots of ideas, but didn't feel confident or equipped to actually do something with them. I've been very aware of my need to feel in control these past few months and tonight God dropped it on me that while I may feel ill-equipped to go back to Scotland to raise up a team of youth to keep things growing after I'm gone- god has already prepared, and is continuing to prepare them to rise up. It's not up to me to manage events and pull kids into the church and throw them into leadership, it's about asking God to bring them in and use me to pull out the giftings that He's already put in them. Well if that isn't a load off my shoulders I don't know what would be.
He promises to be faithful, and while I'm sitting here bemoaning beng single and not knowing how to be effective in the things He's leading me into, He's showing me things that I didn't even know I didn't know (yes that really does make sense :) funny the things He uses to teach us hey?
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